fathom.

last drink
i remember once
i got paid for the mishap,
so where would i be for you?
my lonely friend,
i could've written something
to be less abstract,
like my mind incised
anything else
would be just gas.

will i be so lost
i forgot if i was
with or without you;
two depressants later,
all i might have had was dances,
all i had was grieving fortitude.
i could churn with a cough lavished
biting my lip
or say
chew off the wine glass
which redeems me.

my lilith i prayed
i be unborn still in your womb.
i understand why i'd be eyeless,
my head down
thinking maybe i'd forget
that somewhere you be safe.
as i
never got to let you go.

and for this i fathom,
somewhere
i can buy more time
until my last drink
just maybe
i wouldnt be so comforted..
so still
i'd think of words
only so for the just